Monday, November 22, 2010

Ummm...help?

Ok...So, I'm in my brothers wedding next October.  It's a huge honor, and I'm excited, but I found out the what bridesmaid dress looks like:


Ok...I'm not a size 2...I'm overweight and well-endowed.  I'm really nervous about this dress.  I have no idea how I'm going to wear a bra...and I NEED to lose a considerable amount of weight so that I don't feel like a cow in the dress.  HELP ME!!!!!  Please...tips, advice...Anything. 

Thank you.  :)

12 comments:

Danielle said...

I just had to comment on the dress it is so gorgeous!

Over the summer I went from 136 pounds to 123 all from walking and eating a little healthier. Not sure how far away the wedding is, but I think it took me a a good amount of time to loose the weight.

If you do have the time, keep at it and don't get discouraged. Weight loss (especially for the long-term) does take time, but if you stick with your plan and stay confident, I can guarantee you will lose weight :)

Also don't deprive yourself! Try to eat a lot of vegetables, fruit and fiber. I hope this helped!

Let them have Polish! said...

I know this is cliche and not what anyone wanting to lose weight wants to hear .. There is no quick fix but changing little things wil make a huge dif. High Protein, low carb, lots of water, lots of fruits. Cut out "white" foods" (ie pasta, white bread, sugar) taking walks helps a lot too. They dont have to be power waks or anything just walking makes a dif. I've stuck to this and I went from 163 to 117 in what seemed like no time. The key is to stay motivated. You can do it! The dress is gorgeous!

Cel said...

The dress is gorgeous nad I agree with what the girls above said. There is still plenty of time until the summer so I think that with some changes you can drop a considerable amount of weight until then. Also, get some spanx. There are many different shapes and I bet you can find one to go with the dress. I was wearing spanx under my wedding dress last year and believe me, it makes you feel great. Even celebrities wear them under their dresses for the oscars and the like.

Crystaliciousss said...

hmmm do you have a picture of the back? I am getting married next month and there is a lot bridal underwear can do ;)(i personally don't see why its not for everyday use heehee)

First of all, when you are happy about your weight, don't let other people drive you crazy, but if you do, maybe a matching bolero can make up for the nakedness of the dress. Or maybe it is time to start planning losing some pounds, if you take it slow you should be able to loose one or two kilo's every month...added up to october that's quite a lot, but i don't know what your weight is right now :)
I used to weigh 85 kilos at 1.72 i am currently 73...why??? I started drinking full sugar coke so i am satisfied after one glass and continue with sparkly water, I do eat cheese fondue when i crave it or belgian chocolate but not a 6 pack of kitkats (believe me i looove them)but i guess quality goes over quantity :) good luck sweetie! big hug

Taki J said...

Lots of raw foods, fresh fruits and veggies, cutting out the sugar (aka "The Devil") and some exercise should do the trick. I live by the Fat Smash Diet even when I am at my ideal weight because it is more about attaining overall healthy eating habits. I worked out for 2 years with a trainer got strong, lost some weight, but it wasn't until I really took control of my diet that I noticed great differences in my body. Get a buddy to go walking with, sign up for a 5K, just get moving. The combo of diet and exercise really does work but it takes an effort. No quick fixes. I also recommend writing down everything that you eat. It really helps you see the true picture of what you are putting in your body. Remember if you lose it to fast there are statistically higher chances that you will put it right back on. I understand that you have a deadline but make sure your goal is realistic so that you can attain it in a healthy way. Sorry so long but I just wanted to share what has worked well for me. Good luck with it and continue to post about it. I would love to hear about your approach and your progress (and setbacks, they do happen). You have a cheering section to encourage you along the way!!!

Jen said...

Thanks everyone! The wedding is about 10.5 months away. Plenty of time. I just have SUCH a hard time sticking to a healthy eating/exercise plan because of how busy life is...but yeah, I'm going to have to change some things!
I don't have a picture of the back, but it looks like it comes down pretty far. Not sure a bra is going to work...I think I've heard of those petal things that stick to your skin...I'm going to need some major support in the bust. I'm a DD cup!

Thanks again...any and all advice is welcome!

HatkeySilently said...

Rather than hating your body and trying to make it do the impossible? What you can do is talk to the person who chose this dress about your concerns. Say "I'm not sure this dress would look great on my body type, what do you recommend?" Maybe they'll make a different choice, or allow you to wear a cardigan or something so you feel more comfortable. Making yourself miserable and trying to lose a lot of weight in a short amount of time just isn't going to work. If you do manage to lose it all, you will likely gain it back immediately after the wedding. I know that's not what you want to hear, but if everyone who dieted always kept the weight off, the diet industry wouldn't exactly be thriving like it is.

Please reconsider your decision to try and lose a large amount of weight just to fit into a dress for a few hours at someone else's wedding and try to love your body instead. PLEASE. There are not enough words in the English language to adequately communicate how sad it makes me that your first reaction to this was "I need to change my body", because you don't. Your body is yours. Please don't let other people feel like you need to change the way you look just to make their wedding picture perfect, that is a horrible mindset and I've seen so many people fall victim to it.

In the meantime, I highly recommend reading up on Health at Every Size, and Kate Harding's blog posts if you can. You do not need to feel bad about being overweight and well endowed - hell, I'm overweight and well endowed. It is not BAD. Our bodies are not ugly. And I kind of resent the implication that people with bodies like ours look like cows too :/ Plus sized women do not look like cows... and we should not be expected to starve ourselves or work ourselves to the bone to fit someone else's ideal of beauty.

Zara said...

That's a beautiful dress, but I think I'd be a bit offended if someone expected me to wear that dress. I'm not a DD, but I am overweight and fairly well-endowed, and I think I would look hideous in that dress.

I am losing weight, though, and one tip I got from a nutritionist has been very helpful for me. When I eat a meal, I try to make sure that half the plate is vegetables, a quarter is starch, and a quarter is meat. While this obviously isn't the only "rule" one would want to go by, it's helped me a lot. Best wishes, and do keep us updated on how you're doing! We're cheering for you!

Erin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Erin said...

I agree with miss Hatkey. It's not at all wrong to want to lose weight, but will a lifelong, lasting motivation be to fit into a dress? No. It has to be a very personal choice that you make and back up with serious drive that comes from inside you. I just don't see that happening over a dress.

And being part of the DD Brigade, girl, I just DON'T see the cut of that dress agreeing with your lovely shape. ;)

Talk to your soon-to-be sister in law. Chances are that she's a skinny thing with other skinny bridesmaids that's overlooked you. ;) Ask her what she thinks about it, and share your very real uncertainties. While pretty, dresses like that are NOT made to flatter anyone above a size six. Maybe you could bring pictures of alternative dresses in the same color that she could consider letting you wear. There are a lot of dress options out there that would look just as good on a size four as they do on a size twenty-four. :)

You should never feel ashamed for being different. I hope that the bride will understand and give you a good alternative that you're comfortable with.

Jen said...

Thanks again everyone....Weight has been a life-long battle with me. Having 2 kids hasn't helped because my shape has changed drastically, as well as the fact that I just don't have the time to do the things I used to do. Before I got married I was able to get into a pretty serious workout routine and while the numbers on the scale didn't change, I lost 2 dress sizes. Alas...life catches up with you, and I weigh the most I've ever weighed now.

My sister has the same issues I have with the dress, as well as the fact that she's pretty covered in tatoo's, so she's feeling even more uncomfortable with it.

I'll try and talk with her over the holidays to see if there is some kind of wrap or other cover that we could wear...but in the mean time...losing weight is still, and will always be a focus of mine. Image issues aside, I would be more healthy!

Thanks again, and I'll keep you all updated!

Kalee said...

i dont know if this sounds bad (and i dont mean for it to) but i think its kind of rude to except someone to wear something that wouldnt be flattering. not saying it was on purpose or she even thought of it at the time (and that IS a beautiful dress) but if i was getting married and had bridesmaids of different sizes i would pick different styles that would be flattering and have my bridesmaids pick which one they want to wear. they would just be all the same color, but no one would suffer all night long, or feel like they look bad, or even feel the need to lose weight just because of a dress.
i dunno, just my thoughts.